Friday, February 22, 2013

not what you think lol

A doctor in Duluth Minnesota wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant. 'Ole, I am goin' huntin' tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all my patients.' 'Yes, sir!' answers Ole. The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: 'So, Ole, How was your day?' Ole told him that he took care of three patients. 'The first one had a headache so I gave him TYLENOL.' 'Bravo, mate, and the second one?' Asks the doctor. 'The second one had stomach burning and I gave him MAALOX, sir,' says Ole. 'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?' asks the Doctor. 'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her panties and lies down on the table and shouts: HELP ME - I haven't seen a man in over two years!!' 'Tunderin' Lard Yeezus, Ole, What did you do?' asks the doctor. J 'I put drops in her eyes!!
You thought I was sending a dirty joke! Its a shame when you post or send something people always think of Dirty stuff :(

Friday, February 8, 2013

It is time to change fromREDNECKhumor toTRUE AMERICAN Humor!! Only it isn't seen as HUMOR, but the correct way to LIVE YOUR LIFE!! If you feel the same, pass this on to yourTrue American friends. Y'all know who they are... You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under GOD.' You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in publicplaces. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You still say 'Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.' You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You bow your head when someone prays. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You've never burned an American flag. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening. You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if: You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same. If you got this email from me, it is because I believe that you, like me, have justenoughTRUE AMERICAN in you to have the same beliefs as those talked about in this email. GOD Bless the U S A !Amen AND YOU ARE A TRUE AMERICAN, IF YOU THINK THE NATIONAL ANTHEM SHOULD ONLY BE SUNG IN ENGLISH!!